


Secondary Players

by TeaRoses



Category: The Handmaid's Tale (TV)
Genre: Gen, Misses Clause Challenge, Verbal Abuse, domestic abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-20 02:26:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17013813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeaRoses/pseuds/TeaRoses
Summary: Brianna knows how to survive, but she may have forgotten how to hope.  Note:  Written just after the second season and has a few bits incompatible with later canon.





	Secondary Players

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Bethynyc](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bethynyc/gifts).



> "Women are interesting and important in real life. They are not an afterthought of nature, they are not secondary players in human destiny, and every society has always known that." - Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid's Tale.

During the fire, Brianna's Commander and his Wife had put her into a car and taken her to a place on the outskirts of town. For once the Commander looked scared, as if he were running for his life. They were all still at that new house for now. Brianna wondered if the old house had burned down. This place was also big, but the surroundings were more rural and full of grass and trees. Brianna might have thought it was beautiful if she had been able to visit it in the old days. Now every place was just a prison, no matter how pretty it looked.

She didn't usually see her fellow Handmaids out here. Most of their groceries were brought by car. But now and then she walked the long path to the nearest market. Mostly Marthas shopped there but she had seen a small woman in red, young like her, that she remembered from before. Her pregnancy was just beginning to show. Brianna had stood next to her and both of them pretended to be hesitating over the vegetables.

"You're... Ofwinston, right?" Brianna asked. 

"Yes. You're Oferic?" said the girl hesitantly. "Eric Dunn's house?"

Brianna nodded. 

"Have you been here since the rebellion?" asked Ofwinston.

"Is that what they're calling it?" asked Brianna.

"That's what Handmaids are calling it. But I guess it wasn't a successful one because nothing much happened. Some houses were destroyed and they said five Commanders got killed, but I don't think it was that many."

"You're probably right," said Brianna. "I don't see anybody panicking anymore."

"Some Handmaids got away," said Ofwinston. She lowered her voice to a whisper. "June. And Emily. And Ofjackson - I never knew her real name."

"Do we know that they got away?" Brianna asked. "Or do we just know they're not here anymore?"

Ofwinston looked crushed, and Brianna regretted being so cynical. "I guess they could be in the colonies," the girl said. "It's not like we have any way to know."

"Maybe they're in Canada," said Brianna. 

"Maybe. And Aunt Lydia got killed."

Brianna's eyes widened with shock. "Aunt Lydia? I can't believe it."

"It's true," said Ofwinston. "I know because they made us all get dressed in our mourning clothes again and pretend we were sorry she was dead."

"At least something good came out of it," Brianna said. "Listen, we should stop talking, or we could get in trouble. I hope we can talk again though. I don't get any information living way out where I do."

"We'll probably see each other again." She patted her belly. "For the birth at least." Whispering again, she added, "My real name is Cassie."

Brianna nodded. "Good luck with..." She trailed off, not knowing how to talk about her pregnancy. But Cassie just nodded and went off to the meat counter.

The day after was a typical day. The Commander had been upset since breakfast. Brianna had been in the kitchen when he came in and said to Jill, the Martha, "This silverware looks disgraceful. Go and contemplate your sins." He never yelled. His anger was something quiet and controlled, and all the more frightening because of it. Brianna got out of the kitchen but on her way up the stairs she could hear him talking to his Wife, Elizabeth, who was always the one who bore the brunt of his anger.

"You are responsible for this house," he said to her. "Pray that you become worthy of it."

When Brianna came downstairs two hours later Elizabeth was still kneeling on the living room carpet, murmuring pleas for mercy and correction. God might grant her mercy, Brianna reflected, but Eric wouldn't. If Elizabeth stopped praying sincerely enough Eric would be there with his bible, making her repeat verses over and over. Sometimes Brianna almost felt sorry for Elizabeth. She had no kind thoughts for either of them, but the Commander was the worst of the two of them and Brianna wondered what Eric's Wife would say if she were allowed to speak honestly. When Elizabeth wasn't kneeling in prayer she would sit on the couch and embroider. She could do that for hours, though Brianna never saw her finish a piece. Everything anyone in the house did had to be as quiet as possible, in the hope that Eric would remain calm.

Generally Brianna stayed out of Eric's way successfully, especially since there was nothing much he wanted from her except the Ceremony and a child. She was mostly able to stay away from Elizabeth too, and Elizabeth was afraid to talk in the first place. Now and then Brianna would sit by her and knit, just to pretend to be obedient. Brianna's mother had taught her to knit, so knitting reminded her of being a child and sitting by her mother's side. Both her parents had worked at the newspaper and they had both died on the same day. When they didn't come home there was no one to fight the men who came to take her to the Red Center. Brianna tried not to think about them too much, because it made her so sad it was hard to get through the days. If they were still alive, if Brianna were still experiencing the end of her own childhood instead of being forced to be a Handmaid... it was better to face reality, as horrible as it was. 

One night when Eric and Elizabeth were too focused on "correcting Elizabeth's misbehavior" to notice, Brianna snuck out and made her way through some trees to see what was on the other side of them. There was a fence, just a chain link fence. Brianna wasn't sure what it was fencing out or fencing in, but she didn't think it could be too important if only a chain link fence were guarding it. She leaned against it and sighed. After a few minutes she heard the music. Someone was playing the harmonica. It was an old hymn, one Brianna remembered from her childhood. For a moment she simply closed her eyes, remembering when music had been everywhere instead of nowhere. She followed the fence toward the sound.

As she walked she heard the music change to some old rock ballad, then again to what sounded like jazz. Finally she saw the musician, standing on the other side of the fence. It was a woman who looked to be about Brianna's age. She was taller than Brianna and had skin that was slightly lighter. She wore dull green, and Brianna realized that there was a neighborhood of Econopeople on the other side of the fence. 

The music stopped and the woman stared at Brianna. "I didn't know any Commanders lived so close," she said softly.

Brianna drew closer to her. "You can keep playing. I'm not going to tell anyone."

The woman looked nervous. "I don't want trouble. That can get you killed these days. Or made into a Handmaid."

"Nobody comes around here. It's just me. Don't worry." She paused. "I'm Oferic."

The woman cocked her head curiously. "I'm Diane. But you're not really Oferic."

Brianna laughed. "Right. I'm Brianna. I didn't know there were Econopeople here."

She put her hand over her mouth after she said it, wondering if she had been offensive, but Diane only laughed.

"It's OK to call us that," she said. "It makes as much sense as anything else." Diane stood straight and recited, "Some people must work to support the economy. Not everyone has the honor of serving the Commanders directly."

"Some honor," muttered Brianna. 

Diane smiled wryly. "Yes, I wouldn't trade places with you. But it's not all that great on this side of the fence either. The public lectures can take hours, and we only go to work or church. Or school when we're young, but for the girls that's just Aunt Brenda teaching us to be obedient."

"You're stuck with Aunts too?" asked Brianna.

"Yeah. And they're not going to let me stay single much longer."

"I'd better get back," Brianna said. "I hope I see you again."

"I'm out here when I can be. Music is the only thing that keeps me sane, and this harmonica is the only instrument I can hide."

"Were you going to be a professional musician? Before?" Brianna asked.

"No, I wasn't good enough for that," answered Diane.

"You sound that good to me!" Brianna said. Then with regret she left the fence.

Whenever she could get away with it Brianna went back. Diane wasn't always there but sometimes she was, and Brianna would listen to the music. It was still a mix of everything, classical pieces, old pop songs, whatever Diane felt like playing. After a while Brianna realized that the music was keeping her sane too.

They would talk sometimes, just for a little while. "I never thought I would miss school," Diane said one night. "But I'd give anything to be back there now, just thinking about friends and teachers and waiting to grow up."

"I liked school," said Brianna. "At least I liked math class. I was good at that, and I was going to major in Math in college. Now I can get in trouble just for counting too high."

"I lived with my aunt and uncle and I still do," said Diane. "My parents died in a car crash a long time before the takeover, so it was just me and them. And I had my best friend, Geri," Diane said. "I don't even know what happened to her. She's not a Handmaid, I don't think, but she's not here. I hope she made it to Canada but I'm almost afraid to find out. Doesn't matter, there's no way I'll ever know anyway."

They didn't talk often. Brianna knew that if she thought about the past too much she would dream about it, and then wake up to this reality, and she couldn't take too much of that. 

One night when she went out Diane was at the fence but she wasn't playing music. "Hey," she whispered to Brianna. "My uncle's a truck driver and he's making a delivery near the border next week. He's going to hack the tracker in the truck and go for Canada and I'm going with him."

Brianna looked at her with shock. "You never said anything!"

"My uncle didn't even tell me. He wanted to make sure of everything."

"What's going to happen if you get caught?"Brianna asked.

"We'll make it! Usually truck drivers don't even think about it, because they might do something to their families, but my uncle is taking my aunt and me with him and it's just us."

"Wow," said Brianna, feeling a flare of jealousy. "Good luck."

"There's room for one more person. If you want to go, we'll take you. All you'd have to do is climb the fence tomorrow night and that's easy."

Brianna felt chills. A place where she could do what she wanted, dress however she wanted, listen to whatever she wanted, maybe even go to school. And she knew she could trust Diane. But that wasn't the problem. If they were caught Brianna knew some of the horrible ways they could make her sorry for running.

"I'm not sure," she said to Diane. 

"You're not pregnant, are you?" Diane asked.

"No, at least there's that. But I'm scared," Brianna said.

"I don't blame you. But really, it will be OK. Sometimes people do get away and we're going to do it. Meet me here tomorrow, about midnight. How long do you think it will take for them to notice you're gone?"

"Until morning," said Brianna.

"Perfect. They won't have any reason to stop the truck. I'll bring you some green clothes in case anyone sees you but the curfew usually keeps everybody inside anyway."

"What if they search the truck?" asked Brianna. "Aren't there Eyes everywhere?"

"Not so much on this side. They only have so many people. My uncle says they never search the trucks anymore. We can get away with it, we really can."

Diane looked so happy. Brianna wanted so badly to say "yes," to believe in this dream of escape, but she wondered if it could possibly be that simple. "I might come," she said to Diane. "If I can. Don't wait for me. I don't want you to get into trouble over me."

Brianna thought about Diane's plan all day, wondering if she could possibly go through with it. That night she sat on the couch near Elizabeth, telling herself that if she gathered her courage she would never have to see her again. Elizabeth was working steadily at her embroidery. After a while she picked up the piece she was working on and held it out in front of her. At first glance it seemed to be just a bunch of flowers but Brianna was surprised when she realized that there were letters hidden in the stitching. Looking carefully, she puzzled out the words. It said, "God is within her, she will not fall."

Elizabeth looked at Brianna without saying anything. Brianna couldn't tell if she knew that she had seen the verse within the flowers or not. After a minute, Elizabeth folded the piece and murmured silently. Then she stood up took the embroidery to the fire, and cast it in to burn. Soon there were only ashes left.

"I'll start a new piece tomorrow," Elizabeth said. 

Brianna knew Elizabeth couldn't possibly know about her plans, but the verse seemed to be a sign that she couldn't ignore. At midnight, she was by the fence as Diane waited on the other side with a green dress. Brianna would climb, and she would not fall, and the next time she heard music she would be able to dance.

**Author's Note:**

> "God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day." Psalm 46:5


End file.
